Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Mysteries....

Today was Sandwich Tuesday - YIPPE !

I am happy to report that the WW in me shared my half of the sub with E, this always turns the puss face in to a happy bunny!

We have had a bit of a dilema...well more of an ID crisis! 'Ganja Boy' checked out with T on Friday, NO long hair... was here over the weekend with long hair.... is it fake?

I can resolve the issue, I was running errands yesterday and low and behold in the grocery store I spy 'Ganja Boy' with a friend. I hide as I don't want to be spied in civilian clothing by guests!

I think his friend with no hair has been staying with him, and checking out for him and confusing us. I can report that 'Ganja Boy' still has long hair !

Today I answered the phone as was asked where were we located... I confirmed our location and the gentleman on the phone told me that he had a delivery for me, he doesn't usually deliver in my town, but there were on the way!

As I was checking out a group of guests a pizza delivery boy passes through the lobby.

Short while later the telephone rings... Mr PP answers it.

I hear him discussing Room numbers... and he is saying there is no one in that room... we don't have a room of that number... I am not sure." Send your delivery boy to the front desk"

A minute later, the pizza boy is standing in front of us, telling us he has a delivery for Rm # 524.

We inform him that we do not have a Room 524.. he did not have a guest name. He informed us he has never had to deliver to this town before and that he is from another town close by. We discuss that there is another Hotel of our chain in that town... and could he possibly be at the wrong hotel. He said he had delivered to that hotel before and it could be possible....

Off he goes....

20 mins go by and a guest comes down... as he is passing the Front desk he stops and say's " I ordered food and it might arrive as I nip out. If I leave you some money can you pay for it please?" Sure not a problem.

As he is exiting the hotel... I look at Mr PP as say... "OMG that was his Pizza, he is in room 254!" He dashes out to the Car Park to check with the guest where he ordered from and what he ordered... sure enough I was correct.

As we are laughing out loud the telephone rings.. it is the pizza restaurant. " Has anyone been down looking for food?"

Yes they have, can you please confirm the order... he huffed and puffed and insisted they don;t deliver to our town... but they were heading back as they had no luck at the other town!

The Guest comes in from running his errand, and I explain what is happening, that is food is heading back to him, for the 2nd time. As we finish our conversation and he is heading up to his room, the delivery boy arrives back.

Can you believe that the Delivery Boy blamed me?! It was all my fault for not suggesting he go to 254??

I did tell him that if anyone is to blame it is the pizza place for not asking for a name and telephone number, and for taking down the room number incorrectly!

I have never been able to order food without leaving my Name and Number?!

I think that was the longest pizza delivery ever, and it had to have been cold for sure.

One last thing I have to mention.. and then I am done.

When taking a reservation today I asked... "What type of room would you like?

She spouted off..."The most Allergen Free, quiet room... Not above the Kitchen, Not near the Ice Machine, Not Near the lift, not near the door. As for size of room... the cheapest!" I then get to method of payment.... I am reserving it with my MasterCard because the expiration date on my American Express is expiring before I arrive, but I require you to remind me at check in that I want to pay using my AMEX. I might forget ! ! ! !

Gosh I must make a note of that one !

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Just a regular Tuesday !

Nothing too exciting to report this past week....

No sign of Ganja boy since my last blog.

Every Tuesday host a Networking Meeting in our conference room, and today was no different. They start early... networking at 7-9.

I was startled by the arrival of Mr.PP at 7.15 this morning... he tried to sneak up on me, but I sensed he was there. I thought for a moment he was here to check up on me... making sure I was attending to the Breakfast room as I should... I really should have made him sit in my chair for a while so he could benefit from the blinding sun, and  I could see him fumble around with white spots in front his eyes... it really is blinding!

He came in early to tackle the mess in his office... I should start by letting you know that Mr. PP is a hoarder of anything that moves and doesn't move! This is not a task that is going to be completed in the hour he has allowed, I am guessing if he shows up an hour early everyday to tidy it, it may take at least 50 days and that is just office #1... he has 2!

Tuesday have become Sub-Tuesday for Me and B... this week was different, she had a lunch meeting which left me minus lunch!

I ate a late breakfast of a Banana and Frosties.... and by 1.30pm I couldn't take it anymore... the only option for a weight watcher was OATMEAL for lunch.

I went to the pantry, grabbed a packet of oatmeal, and a bowl provided for the guest for just this. Emptied the package,added water and placed it in the microwave for 1 minute.

Easy you say.... well not for me today...

That bloody oatmeal spewed everywhere... I opened the microwave to a rolled up bowl... resembling a taco stuffed with oozing oatmeal. The bowl was rock hard and the oatmeal pretty much everywhere, but no longer in the bowl.

It took me 10 mins to clean up the sodding mess.... which then led to the phone ringing, which left me to leave with no lunch...

Those of you that know me... know that does not make for a happy girl.

The newly purchased luggage cart went for an outing to Rm 103, the car park and back... he looked so happy to have been moved from the lobby for a short while.

Rm 103 could not understand why his key card never worked... I had to replace them 3 times this morning... I asked repeatedly are you keeping them with your cell phone... magnets anything that is zapping them, because this is very unusual....

NOPE, nothing....

Well, when they left, they chuckled about the key experience... I will be coming back soon to see how many other locks they can break. At this point I discovered he was keeping it in his money clip.

Surprise... it has a whooping big magnet in it to keep it closed!

Case closed !!!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Boobies... (o)(o)

I was only talking to my good friend Sue last night about the topic of this blog... though nothing had really happened in the hotel that could make it interesting and I didn't really know where to begin.

Well today it seems I get my chance to cover this topic... my eyes are still burning so I have to share it with you.

I am at the fax machine therefore not at the Front Desk, I can see it if I look up and turn my head to the right. I hear a tap and do just that.

It was a sight that no-one, no man, women or beast should have to endure. It is still so vivid in my mind.

This sight was an older gentleman, in the age bracket of 60 +, he was shorter than average and over weight...AKA DUMPY. Imagine the long grey chest hair over the large round belly and the 2 biggest boobs hanging so low they almost came to rest on my counter!

What.. you can't imagine and need a visual.... well here you go. This is what I saw.

Now if you have known me since Kingdown, yes my Art has not improved ! Pic quality not really that good, but I hope you can suffer too!


So as I said my eyes were burnt, I could barley see the key card he was waving at me... which I hasten to add verified and should have been working perfectly!

What on earth makes this man think that it is OK to do this? To walk around a public place with his Man Boobs on display for all to try and NOT see?

The vision just would not go away and I have been overwriting it in my head and pondering....

If he had been late 30's, dark, average height and handsome with abs of steal, solid pecks, bulging biceps and a smile to make your insides flutter I would not have thought.. Why do you think it is perfectly ok to stand there like that?, but blushed and dropped the room key !

But that is the visual I am using to clear this nasty eye scarring, and one day hope to be that lucky!

So MAN BOOBS.. BIG HANG LOW  NO GO SHOW. SOLID AS A ROCK.. PLEASE STOP BY!

This also applies to the ladies too. It seems I am the only lady who knows they sell a thing called a strapless bra.

Believe it or not, they are a great asset to your strappy sun dress or tank top because.. yep NO straps, and perfectly placed boobies.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am not a small girl. Never in my life have I ever thought it 'OK'  to leave the house bra less... even with a built in shelf my strapless is coming with me.

Everyone needs to know that you can only use the shelf solo if you have small hard lumps in place of your breasts.

So all of you women that sit in my breakfast room or come to the front desk minus a bra, with your tits as far down as your belly button... I am telling you it is WRONG... just WRONG. Please love your breasts and have them in the perfect position every time you are in public,.. especially at my work place.

I have in  he past raise a lot of money for Breast Cancer, my mother is a survivor and remind you all to check your boobies regularly.... preferably before you put them in their rightful place!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Happenings...

I have been slack on my blogs, its just I have been so busy with my life... I hate to miss a week so this is it. I hope it isn't too long winded for you all.

Today I got a very strange call...

" I would like to make a Reservation.. but 1st. Can you tell me how old your Mattresses are?"

Unfortunately I had no flipping clue... so just replied.

"No I don't but if you like a firmer mattress over a soft then this is a special request we can try to accommodate"

I am pleased to announce I now know the answer and am better prepared for the next time I get asked the question. The correct answer is....

"Less than 5 years"

~

Did I tell you about Ganja boy ?

He has been residing in #124 and 126 over the past 2 weeks. 

He checks in very early in the morning.... smokes and fills the halls with the smell of weed all morning long... and then stays another night.

Sometimes I worry that Housekeeping are going to get the effects of 2nd hand smoke and I am going to get left out!

The other day he came down to the front desk to extend his stay and he couldn't get back in the room. Seems he had left his room via the sliding door... forgot this and tried to get back in the locked door.

This same night he acquired the munchies.... and I guess the only option for him was the vending machine by Door B. This vending machine is not owned or operated by the hotel, and outside company comes every week to restock it. Seems in Ganja boys munchie attack he purchased a Hostess cake from the vending machine...in the mad rush to cram it into his mouth he missed the mold... until the last bite. 

He bought what was left to L, who could only offer him a refund and pass on the details to the vending company..he did not want to part with the moldy bite that was left.. and seemed upset he may get sick from eating the mold!

He is harmless enough... I have given him a lesson on how to access your room with a key, so he should be good this week if he shows up.

~

It was a weekend for a visit from a regular drunk.... I pity housekeeping. If you are going to binge drink please where a depend when you sleep!

~

I am bracing myself for the Naked Weekend...








Friday, July 23, 2010

A week in July.....

It has been a busy and entertaining week and the hotel motel... NOT Holiday Inn.

This week saw the arrival of Mrs B.. #129.  Mrs B is at least 80 years old... Deaf as a post but a sweet ole dear.

Breakfast ends at 10am... she arrives every morning at 9.55am. She has been staying with us annually for what I can tell is longer than I have been alive! This means she feels right at home and treats it as such.

The beginning of the week when she arrived the room was pretty much eaten and drunk dry. She has kept me on my toes... making sure she has enough decaf when she arrives and milk too.

Wednesday Mrs B called the Front  Desk and yelled down the phone as deaf people often do...

" CAN YOU LISTEN TO MY MESSAGES"

I replied telling her that to do this I would need to come to her room and retrieve them for her. After yelling loud enough the entire hotel could hear me without the need of a telephone... she got the message that I would come down at the end of my shift. This I did... 8 messages later I wrote them all down for her. She has a very busy social life for an 80 year old. I was quite jealous!

The following morning I say Good Morning as she is sitting eating her Cheerios.... no reply.

I am still pottering about cleaning up, and yep you guessed it, it is past 10.15 and breakfast is over.... still no communication. Eventually I get her attention by a little wave and she informs me in a very loud voice...

I TURNED MY HEARING AID OFF COS THE TELEVISION AND THE OTHER PEOPLE ARE TOO LOUD.. and by the way your handwriting is lovely!

I had to chuckle...

One morning this week and I cannot remember which exactly I arrive and a Big tour bus is parked out front... Now Santana was playing at the local arts centre the night before and for a minute I thought he needed emergency accommodation! Lots of people sat in the sunny breakfast room speculating who was staying... some had the same thought as me and wanted to know where Santana was eating breakfast. Turns out the bus was a group of surfer dudes touring catching waves up the east coast... Nice kind a lifestyle if you can get it!

I had a very funny telephone conversation today in which I was asked... "What is there to do in your town?" My immediate reply was... "Depends what your into" I established that they were travelling with children... so other than the beach... I gave them...

Outback Steakhouse to eat
Kohls to shop
Mini Golf
Bowling
Movies
Our pool.... I mean what else do you need on vacation!

Another call from another hard of hearing guest wishing to book his stay... Mr M, after yelling and me and finalizing his reservation I must be sure to let Mr PP know of his arrival... I did... but Mr M called back 10 mins to remind me again and also could I call the rewards program and let them know of his intended stay.. Sure thing Mr M.. I am right on it! He let me know that there was a really nice lady at the front desk when he visited last year... I reassured him that she had been replaced with another lovely lady and he trip will be wonderful :-)

We have another family join us through the Red Cross, this lucky family and 5 children survived a blazing home which was struck by lightening. They are a very sweet and lovely family and they are appreciating life and reminding me not to sweat the small stuff as I search for a room for them Saturday night in our already full house...

Lets hope the weekend staff enjoy their job as much as I do... its going to be a busy one with 2 weddings and a memorial group in house. I am sure by the time Monday arrives Mr PP is going to be completely stressed out and start my day off just great... Bring it on, I intend to relax all weekend long !

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Whatever takes your fancy!

I have been made aware that in August there is a group coming to stay called the Hedo Reunion.

Basically they hire the conference room... have a big party and people part of their group call and make reservations for sleeping rooms for as many nights as they would like to stay.

It seems that this week we had a guest staying for the week who already has reservations as part of this group.... and has told other guests about how wonderful this party is.

Hedo = Hedonism = Nakedness... Swingers... Orgy... or just simply a low key party attended by people who like pleasure.

What am I in for?

I have started to hear talk... I think it will involve Swingers... and Nakedness and as we all know, when people are a part of a group like this... just like the people that go the the Nudest beach.... they are not supposed to be seen NAKED.

I am not sure I am going to make it through these 4 days without laughing OUT LOUD a lot.

I have a few weeks to prepare of this event, I think I am going to need it.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Me, B and Mr PP!

That is Tuesday's.

Me, Thee and He !

Some are good and some are bad.

Tuesdays has also developed into $5 Sub day too... This is not good for the Weight Watcher in me, but delicious all the same. Some weeks I eat my half, others I share my half with E. Today she had already had a nice healthy lunch of Oatmeal Cookies so I scoffed the lot, that Turkey sure tasted yummy.

Networking meeting was at breakfast time, they are rude some days and nice the others. Today there was only one nice one about. Mr A, the Limo Man! Maybe they are not morning people and this is why they are cranky. They come every week...and they are a little too comfortable now. Like today, they stroll in to the breakfast room and take for their use 4 chairs. This leaves 2 tables, chairless...WTF?! are they paying guest supposed to kneel and eat their breakfast?

Within 30 mins a entire football team from a high school appear for breakfast and I am 4 chairs short of a diner!

To the closet I go... I was so thankful E had decided to show up for work at 8am otherwise I would have been even more pee'd off than I already was.

4 chairs later and everyone has a seat.. approximately 30 muffins were consumed and a lot of bagels. They were very well behaved boys, polite too... the coach really had them under control.

The phone rang non stop... I munched in between calls. This is a talent I have developed... who would have guessed!